| Art Jokes |
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ART JOKES... A guy in Paris nearly got away with stealing several paintings from the Louvre. However, after planning the crime, breaking in, evading security, getting out and escaping with the goods, he was captured two blocks away when his van ran out of gas. When asked how he could mastermind such a crime and then make such an obvious error, he replied... "I had no Monet to buy Degas to make the Van Gogh."
The Mona Lisa was brought up in court on charges of murder, but it turned out that she'd been framed.
Vincent van Gough walks into a bar, and the bartender asks him if he'd like a drink. "No thanks," says Vincent, "I've got one 'ere."
Q: How many visitors to an Art Gallery does it take to change a light bulb? A: Two. One to do it and one to say "Huh! My four-year old could've done that!"
Sight for sore eyes... In the prime of her career, a world famous painter started to lose her eyesight. Fearful that she might lose her life as a painter, she went to see the best eye surgeon in the world. After several weeks of delicate surgery and therapy, her eyesight was restored. The painter was so grateful that she decided to show gratitude by repainting the doctor's office. Part of her work included painting a gigantic eye on one wall. When she had finished her work, she held a press conference to unveil her latest work -- the doctor's office. One reporter noticed the eye on the wall, and asked the doctor, "What was your first reaction upon seeing your newly painted office, especially that large eye on the wall?" The eye doctor responded, "I said to myself, 'Lucky I'm not a gynaecologist.'
The Art Collector A famous art collector is walking through the city when he notices a mangy cat lapping milk from a saucer in the doorway of a store. He does a double take. He knows that the saucer is extremely old and very valuable, so he walks casually into the store and offers to buy the cat for two dollars. The storeowner replies, "I'm sorry, but the cat isn't for sale." The collector says, "Please, I need a hungry cat around the house to catch mice. I'll pay you 20 dollars for that cat." And the owner says "Sold," and hands over the cat. The collector continues, "Hey, for the twenty bucks I wonder if you could throw in that old saucer. The cat's used to it and it'll save me from having to get a dish." The owner says, "Sorry buddy, but that's my lucky saucer. So far this week I've sold sixty-eight cats."
Why are a lot of famous artists Dutch? Because they were born in Holland.
Doctor, Doctor I keep painting myself gold. Don't worry it's just a gilt complex! Brindle Style Artists & Musicians Forum
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